Ramblings- from "itty bitty titties" to explant... Part III Booby Beatitude

July 18, 2019

Explant was on July 12, 2019.

 

I am feeling beatitude already. Beatitude is a feeling of joy and blessedness.


Today is day 6 post op. If you follow anyone's story of breast explant surgery, you will most likely get a day by day update. This is because, for so many women, the days leading up to this explant have been brutal. It was a mind fuck, to say the least. AND I succumbed to my ails. I let my body hurt. I wanted to feel everything so that I could let it go and appreciate my new body and life to come. 

 

When one goes for months, years, decades, having mystery illnesses or conditions and finally puts two and two together, you can say there is a relief to put a name to the symptoms. You can say that there is a sadness or initial grief to admit that the boobs they paid for however many years ago, will most likely be gone. They will return to the self they were prior implants.  

 

Some experience a lot of anger too. Anger that they didn't know that a boob job could cause illness. Anger that they weren't warned about possible health concerns other than the risk of death during surgery. That is a common risk. That a boob job wasn't the sexiest thing ever, that it isn't that sexy to have constant headaches, pain, and a variety of auto-immune disorders. Not sexy to have a big hard boob that hurts when you touch it. 

 

 

So, post op day six. Still have drains. Still a lot of blood coming out. Not as bright red as day one, but still blood. My surgeon had quite a time getting my capsules removed in one piece. One capsule was full of a dark brown thick fluid, might make you look differently at chocolate pudding from now on. Below is the amount of fluid removed from my capsule. The implant was actually ruptured and the saline should have absorbed into my body. So, who can explain what this stuff in my boob capsule was? Not even the doctors know.  Below is each capsule, removed en bloc (aka in one piece), from my body. The dark marks are where the doctor had to cauterize it from my tissues as it grows to be a part of your body. If it is under the muscle, as mine were, it attaches to your rib cage. The plastic surgeon that put them in never told me that I would be at risk of a punctured lung if I ever had the capsules removed due to the proximity to the ribs/lungs. Most plastic surgeons don't believe in the illness, and often times they convince patients to remove implants and replace with a brand new set.  Most plastic surgeons are not versed in removing capsules. Capsules are where the problems lurk, grow, and the tissue can become diseased and even cause a cancer caused BIA-ALCL. Where was this in the literature when we had implants? 

 

 

 

I am not angry. I am not saying you shouldn't get implants. I am not a boob hater, plastic surgeon atheist, or a judgemental "newly flat chested" woman. I am a health educator. I believe that every person deserves to know all the facts, risks, and issues prior to implanting any device into their body. 

 

Would I get implants again? NO. I spent 25 years with them. I am going to learn to love myself again. I want to go back and tell that young lady that she could have loved herself more. But I didn't. I will now. 

 

If you do not love yourself enough now, boobs will not make that happen. Just saying. You gotta dig deeper. 

 

From this point on, everything is going to be about BEATITUDE. I deserve it. AND so do you. 

I am not going to dwell on what I didn't know, or wasn't told. I am not looking at a lawsuit or jumping on any other bandwagon than education, promotion, and healing. 

 

 

Please stay tuned for more post surgery updates where I will be sharing my recovery journey, diagnosis, path to healing, detox info, pictures, missions, outreach, and education about BII and BIA-ALCL. 

 

My next crochet project, great for winter and raising awareness about implant illness. 

 

 

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